The first 25 are listed in order photographed, starting in Fall 2019 through December 2022.

Ambrosia C.

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I used a skirt I made and my books from school to show that I am multi-talented. I’m a tatted veteran who enjoys sewing and being a mom but that’s still not all that is me, there are layers to me as a person that are sometimes unexpected.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Yes, because I wanted it to be something that showed who I am as a whole and not just bits and pieces of myself like most photos are.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I felt that being a “last photo” there was a lot of pressure as to what to put into the photo, but I wouldn’t say there was more that I wanted to put into it.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I wanted to show all the layers that make me me. I think the viewer might just see the sunflowers or the nerdy books but my hope is that they take every piece of the photo into consideration.

Roarie

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

It’s the classic rebel boy look – white t shirt, black jeans, leather jacket, boots

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Yes, The leather jacket is something I decorated. It’s slogan of “No one asked you” was intentional and also visually showed my creativity. I felt the leather jacket also represented the tough guy persona  I’ve often seen in my own work and personal life. My docs are a classic. They are the only item that I’ve consistently had with me in all of my 9 years of travel, from the beaches of Thailand to the ruins in Peru. All purposefully juxtaposed with my vulnerable eye gaze, alluding to a softness beneath the rough exterior. I think this captured me well.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No, I feel happy with what we captured. The project was adequately described and there was enough time to think about my approach before the shoot date.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

Hopefully it plays with gender lines. Other than that, I hope I was subtle enough in my choices that there is still room for people to read their own meaning. I love to hear what other people see when looking at the same thing, it shows how many different perspectives there are in the world and can be very enlightening. 

Devi

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

Was feeling silly and playful and wanted to create a colorful, cute, warm, fuzzy vibe.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

I guess I didn’t wanna try too hard to be profound or overthink it. I dunno, I like stuffed animals. They represent a side of my personality 🤷‍♀️

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No, not really. I didn’t feel any particular pressure, although I suppose I didn’t have all the time in the world to make it some kind of masterpiece. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

Be in touch with the child in you, it’s an important part of your essence.

Charlotte

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose to pose nude because it’s representative of my career as a freelance model. Looking back, I think maybe I should have worn a band tee and a leather jacket and combat boots, but I don’t think that would have photographed as well. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Not really, I mostly winged it, which is how I go into most of my shoots. I find you get a more authentic result that way. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I felt a little bit limited by being in front of a black backdrop, rather than being outdoors in nature, where there are more elements to interact with to create a more dynamic shot. But in the end, I don’t think that mattered. I’m very happy with the photos we captured. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I was trying to show my abilities as an art model and flow through poses in hopes of landing on something great for one of the photos. 

Vivian Cove

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

Frankly, my choices were not entirely conscious–I moved mostly from impulse! As a female model with a feminine build, I suppose I wanted to shift the roles of gender momentarily so that I could experience what it is like to possess more masculine traits. I asked Mike, the photographer, what kind of clothing makes him feel feminine, and he selected the outfit with some input from myself. It also felt imperative for us to be on both sides of the camera in our attire so that we could experience our role reversal from different perspectives. By being behind the camera, I felt more casual, objective, and technical. By being in front of the camera, I felt more performative, “object”, and outwardly expressive. I still question if both of us carried ourselves more authentically in our reverse roles while posing or while photographing, and that itself is an investigation.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

I experienced challenges with gender growing up. I was born a girl who grew up with conventionally girly interests, like playing barbies and dressing up as Disney princesses. However,  I was sexualized at an early age and never had the resource to articulate my confusion around what that meant. As I got older, I grew into more boyish features and had a desire to be less feminine. Many mistook me as a boy. Yet I also still loved girly things! Then I felt unattractive and wanted to look more feminine again, yet uphold more traditional masculine expectations that society condones such as being hypersexual. Long story short, I have never really taken the time to sit with my gender and understand how to relate to it. It’s been too confusing and painful, and at the same time, it never really felt too tormenting because I never questioned the fact that I am a bisexual cis woman. I found this Last Portrait project as an opportunity to finally peel the onion, so to speak, and to start doing more dissecting, and getting more clarity around my identity that could be potentially healing. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I love this question. In the middle of doing this project, I thought of another theme entirely. While I find the role of gender an important topic in the modeling/photographer paradigm, it is often a tired conversation filled with complexity. I wish I was a bit more thorough or strategic with my approach because the topcic of gender is so multifaceted and deep. It requires more time, conversation, and investigation. So the theme that came to mind in the middle of this project was “fear”, and I suppose the theme of gender brought that to the forefront. Fear is so broad yet can be such an instantaneously emotional experience that I wanted to see what would emerge from that. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer? 

I suppose it tells the viewer we all have masculine features and feminine features. I would want them to feel safe to explore that within themselves, whether it’s an internal dialogue or an external modality. I want to normalize that gender, in all of its fluidity, is safe, remarkably beautiful, and does not have to look any which way.

Astrid K.

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I choose something basic, but that I’d otherwise wear. Often while modeling I’m putting on a show, so I thought it’d be interesting to see myself in a photograph

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Yes, although I’m hoping I’ll be modeling with dolphins before I take my last photograph.  Otherwise I thought if I could have anything, it’d be a nice photo of myself

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

Not really. Although… there weren’t any dolphins.  I guess I’d be underwater if I could’ve. Maybe in an ideal world I’d have my cat with me

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

This is the version of myself I want others to see. I want to model everything, but I wanted a photo of the face behind that

Lexi

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I wanted the pose to be comforting and Angel like, so that way the last image of me would be one of me at peace 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

If this was last my last portrait, I assume that my death would be near, which is why I went for the heaven/ Angel like qualities 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No, I was happy with the portrait, it was peaceful and calm, simple and quiet. Exactly what I was going for 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I was trying to say that I am at peace, that death is not scary. I would hope it tells the viewer to not be sad that I am gone, but to be happy

Perrin Marie

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose to be nude because I believe being in my most natural state offers the image a sense of honesty, strength and vulnerability. 

I believe in simplicity and what’s more simple than a single marker and naked skin?

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

This has been an idea in the back of my concepts closet for a while now. I’m glad to have been able to take it out and dust it off.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I would like to redo the concept with bigger letters.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

The meaning behind the portrait is whatever the viewer should interpret it to be.

Ariel

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose the glitter because that is what I have always joked about being mixed with, if I were to die and be cremated. I wear glitter around my eyes just about everyday, and have done so since I was about 14 (I am now 31). A few people have called glitter my signature. For the blanket I chose to lay on for a backdrop, it is metallic and goes with the glitter, and also gives off a “mermaid” vibe. My name is Ariel, and though I was born before The Little Mermaid came out, I still found it appropriate for the photo’s sake when searching for something to lay on. I chose to lay down and do a shoulders and up picture because I wanted my wavy hair to be a prominent part in the photo, as it also goes with the mermaid vibes.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Just the glitter representing what I would want to be mixed with if I were cremated after death, as it is what I am known for among my friends. The term “Last Portrait” triggers a deathly vibe, so it’s what made sense to me.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

Initially I wasn’t going for the mermaid vibes, but I am okay with it because my name is Ariel. I guess if I redid it, I would aim for less mermaid vibes with a different background, and maybe do it sitting up. I wouldn’t say I was restrained, I just didn’t know what the photos would turn out like so I was just winging it.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I was trying to show myself covered in glitter, as my signature, so after death people who knew me would look at it and immediately remember the glitter I wore on a daily basis. Though I don’t wear the glitter all sprawled out like it is in my Last Portrait, it definitely shows and stands out and is flashy to represent my glitter that I do wear. I don’t necessarily think or believe the photo I chose tells the viewers anything, unless you know me. To a stranger, it probably just looks like a mermaid covered in glitter. If you know me, you see my face, the bright colors, and the symbolic glitter that I am known for.

Zenobia

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose to wear a long gold dress with a halo crown because I felt as if it perfectly expressed the look and concept of a goddess. I also felt as if the pose was simple, elongated and strong.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way? 

It definitely did because I have always seen my inner self as a strong willed and elegant goddess but I have never really showed it. So if it actually was my last portrait I would want people to see me how I see myself even if I was too afraid to show it previously.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

Nope! The portrait was actually beyond my expectations and I love it

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I feel as if every women is a goddess in their own way and I hope to empower more women to be more confident and think of themselves as a goddess as well

Christina

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose? 

I have this strange feeling that I’m not like other women, that there’s something about me that’s just… different. So, I chose the Lilac formal gown to show royalty that I am a Queen.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way? 

No, not really

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not? 

No, because nothing else needs to be said.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer? 

I Honor my choices and I am actually proud of them, even if they seem crazy to others. People close to me get nervous and concerned thinking that I’m making the wrong choices and just can’t resist trying to give me advice, but I know my own path.  I know that I don’t have to justify anything to them because my life is my life.

Dean

As a younger man my life was pretty normal, had a home girlfriend and everything was pretty normal. Slowly, I lost the ability to have sex, erectile dysfunction. Not normal for a young man. I struggled with it for about a year, so I finally went to the doctor for a blood test. Results discovered that I had very low testosterone. Like most doctors they just treated the symptom not the cause, I never looked into what was causing the low testosterone. Replacement testosterone therapy still did not help. Some years later Viagra, Levitra and Cialis hit the market. One by one I tried them all and still no positive results. I would go from doctor to doctor and even an Urologist. Looking for an answer of what was causing the problem. The best diagnosis they came with was psychiatric problems, they cannot find any physiological reason as to the erectile dysfunction. After years and years of seeking medical attention an urologist explained why doctors cannot solve men’s erectile dysfunction. 

He explained to me that in America sexual function or dysfunction is not a health concern according to the American Medical Association therefore insurance companies do not pay for the treatment of erectile dysfunction. Therefore, doctors are not trained in the area since it is not necessary for them to learn it because they will not get paid for treating it. Years ago doctors were taught that sexual dysfunction in men is 90% caused by psychiatric problems, this was a time insurance companies did not recognize psychiatrist as legitimate doctors and did not pay for Psychiatric Services. This was a simple way to reduce their liability and not have to cover sexual functions in men or women. 

Later when insurance companies recognized psychiatrists, insurance companies just added exclusions to all insurance policies. Most medical insurance policies have an exclusion that reads, (sexual function or dysfunction or any side effects of treatment of sexual or dysfunction is not covered). That explained why I had no luck going from doctor to doctor. The only thing that happened from complaining about erection dysfunction was raising my health insurance rates to the point I could not afford them. I ended up having to switch to a major medical policy. For insurance companies Erectile dysfunction can be a sign of cardiac problems for men and when a man complains to a doctor of erectile dysfunction it puts them in a higher risk category where health insurance premiums will go up. 

Years later private companies came out with men’s clinics to help treat erectile dysfunction. Most of them at the time used injection therapy to help induce an erection that was somewhat helpful but was very costly and painful. I was referred to a urologist specialized in the treatment of erectile dysfunction. Because I was very young he recommended revascularization of the erectile tissue but rerouting blood vessels to supply more blood. At the time most doctors thought that erectile dysfunction was a blood supply problem and most still today think that erectile dysfunction it’s just a blood supply problem. The operation was not successful; it left scars physically and mentally. I completely gave up on any hope of having a normal sex life. 

Years later as I got older, I developed gynecomastia, an enlargement of the breast tissue in men. I became very self-conscious of it and went to the plastic surgeon to have it corrected. For most men gynecomastia is just a fat buildup, so the surgeon did liposuction to remove fat tissue around the breast to reduce them. After the surgery the cosmetic surgeon explained to me that it was development of the mammary glands that caused the breast development, he suggested that I talk to my doctor about possible hormone imbalances, this may have caused it. I made an appointment for a primary care doctor, I talked to him about it he asked me if I was having any other problems, I told him about my erectile dysfunction which I have never talked to him before about because I knew from the past the only thing complaining to a doctor about erectile dysfunction resulted in what’s higher health insurance premiums. I explained to him about my past experience with doctors and health insurance companies. He understood exactly what I was talking about and ordered blood work. The only abnormal result was that I had almost no testosterone in my system. I explained to him that in the past I was put on hormone replacement therapy on and off for many years but it did not help my erectile dysfunction. He said that he can try to get the insurance company to okay some specialized blood work that he could not do without their okay, he went to bat for me and got the insurance companies to okay additional blood work. The blood work showed elevated prolactin levels, with that information he went to bat for me again I got the okay for a brain MRI. After the MRI I asked for a copy to do their radiologist report which I received the next day. I read it but didn’t understand any of the medical terms. When I got home I Googled word by word to understand what they were saying. After I put it all together it basically translated to a tumor in the pituitary, I thought I was a dead man, not understanding that in the pituitary is not fatal like a cancerous brain tumor. 

When I went in to see my primary care doctor he explained the difference and said it’s treatable and not fatal. An appointment was set up to talk to an endocrinologist about treatment options. The tumor was quite large and was pressing against the optic nerve. The endocrinologist sent me to a specialist ophthalmologist that deals with brain tumors to see how much vision I had lost. Some Peripheral vision lost in the left eye was noted. The decision was made that surgery was the best option. There are only a few surgeons in the United States that do this type of surgery luckily for me one of the best was located here in Phoenix. It took months just for the doctor to review my case to see whether or not I might be a good candidate for the surgery. I was but it took months just to see him. I had my sister go with me for moral support and a second set of ears to take in everything. At the appointment the doctor asked my sister to excuse herself because he wanted to talk to me about something. To my surprise his questions was about my sex life, this was the first time that any doctor had any concerns about my sex life. Erectile dysfunction is common with pituitary tumors. He needed to know how many years ago it started, so he knew how long the tumor had been active. After taking down all the information he determined that I would be a good candidate for surgery, it took many more months before the surgery actually happened. After the surgery my million-dollar question was will I ever be able to have an erection to have sex again. That was a question that they could not answer, many factors are involved including the length of time that a patient has been dysfunctional. There wasn’t a whole lot of research in the area. Again insurance companies are not concerned about Men’s sexual health so no research would be supported. 

I was surprised at the medical profession’s lack of knowledge but it comes to the purpose of prolactin in a man’s body. I could not find any medical information about the purpose of prolactin in a man’s body, in a woman’s body pituitary generates prolactin after pregnancy to start the milk production in the mammary glands for the child, but no information about prolactin in a man’s body. The information that I came across was not found in medical journals, but was found in information on bodybuilding. Bodybuilders would use some steroids that cause the pituitary gland to put out prolactin. This causes erectile dysfunction in bodybuilders so they need to take a medicine to suppress prolactin output. Other information came from a paper written by College medical students. They did an experiment they wanted to see what hormones were released during the activity of having sex. They set up the system where they can take blood samples second by second as they were having sex. They discovered that after the man had sex there was a spike in the prolactin output. It was only theorized that this is why men have mood change after sex and loses his erection. This is responsible for the refractory period. That is to say the time that a man is unable to have an erection after sex this may explain why older men take longer to recover after sex than younger men. It is known that prolactin levels increase as a man gets older. Again this is only theories from medical students screwing around, lol, and not actual research. I was lucky, with the help of the medical profession my erectile function returned better than ever. My pituitary did get damaged and does not put out any prolactin, a good thing, my penis and brain does not know when to stop, LOL.

Heather Myers

Why did you make the Choices you did about clothing/Props/Pose?

I choose the scarf around my neck as a symbol of being covered for my mental safety in life, in reality I am exposed and desperate to be free. The hat I used to shade my eyes to see more clearly in life.

The fire frame I choose is a symbol of the rebirth in my life, to walk through the fire a stronger person, using the flames to light my way as I find myself.

My posing was a strong stance with hard angles and closed fist to show power. The fist in my hair to take hold of my life, looking to the side as if looking off into my future to become something meaningful and  Beautiful to myself. 

Did a Possible reason for this being your last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Yes, as described above. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the Portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No.

What were you trying to say with the Photo? What do you think tells the viewer?

I wanted to show my rebirth, strength and power. I feel like it tells the story to the viewer.

Brandy P

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose to dress as my alter ego the Queen B. I went with a white Queen’s robe and crown because that’s what I visualize I would wear as Queen. When posing I wanted to feel sexy but look classy so I kept most of myself covered with my leg extended from robe.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

This project was a lot of fun and helped spike creativity. Knowing the theme would be that it was my Last Portrait made it easy to choose this look because it is how I would want to be remembered. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I felt like I was able to express myself openly and didn’t feel restrained to create content. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I was trying to say that it is important to feel powerful, strong, and confident in my photo. I would want the viewer to be inspired to express themselves and enjoy themselves. 

John

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

The props, clothing, etc, were different points of my life, and stuff that help make up who I am. Pose, was because in my mind, was trying to do one the last time people might see me (confidence from behind, but sadness knowing that it was a “goodbye”).

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Because I understood it in the sense of a goodbye, that I would rather people remember me accepting and trying to fight, even if I knew it might be my last.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

Slightly.. I feel like it might look better walking into a (foggy) forest/wooded area. To show uncertainty of the future with the background.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

That both, there are 2 sides to every story and every person; and that the face they put on for others may be a facade for what the feel inside.

Luna Sonora

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I wanted to wear a white corset to show a blank slate and the delicate feminine. Demure, soft, quiet, and agreeable. It’s quite striking next to the bright, masculine fire. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

This being my last portrait definitely played an important role in my choices. My hope was to, perhaps obscurely, visually showcase a lasting struggle I have, and hint at a hope for the future. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I did feel a bit restrained, only because I didn’t have the resources or know-how to go bigger. Initially, I wanted to somehow be engulfed in flames myself… which wouldn’t have been feasible. But I’m happy with the effect that was achieved.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I don’t know what the viewer will see in this photo. At face value, it’s merely a pretty photograph of a girl holding fire. While it may not be so apparent, this was meant to show how I view overcoming a seemingly impossible struggle. The white corset represents how my own challenges of having a personality disorder and eating disorders, shown as the fire, molded me. Quiet, not confrontational, weak, shy, needing validation, and lacking in vivacity and strength. But in the photo, while the girl is still wearing the white corset of feeling weak and blank, she is gaining control. The fire still affects her, but she’s learning to master it and not be consumed. Holding the destructive fire away from her and not letting it get out of hand means that someday, she may be able to set it down and walk away. I’m not sure how obvious my message is in this piece, but that is perfect when talking about disorders. They’re not easily identifiable and understood, and many people don’t know how insidious and all-encompassing they are. Every part of your being is affected. It’s a war raging on the inside. 

JET

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

Clothing: I wanted something timeless (In my opinion), and matching the theme. 

Props: it can be interpreted as blood and dark. Or art/ lighthearted.  

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Kind of, blood represents so much in the end of times. Plus, my expression looks pensive and would represent me well. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No, I wanted it simple, which can still lead to complexity if done right. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

Trying to say that life is full of pain and trial. 

Tells them there’s more that goes on than on the surface 

Lizzie Dame

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I made my choices off the fact I wanted it to be simple and plain but straight to the point. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

I would want someone to look at this as my last portrait and see me for who I was, who I am. A human, content in my being, awake in my skin. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I feel it came out perfect to my vision. It may seem it lacks creativity due to it’s simplicity but it shows all that I hoped for it to. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I wanted to convey the idea that we come into this world alone and naked and will be leaving (if I get my way) in the same state. We are but flesh and bone, a brain connected to a nervous system that controls a big meat machine. I hope that it tells the viewer to enjoy the body you’ve been given, to not forget you’re on borrowed time and that someday you’ll have to give it back.

Red

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

Everything that I chose is something I either do or work with on the daily. They’re small parts of my life that are incredibly important to me. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

In a way, yes. I tend to be adventurous and have lots of hobbies many of which have become such a part of my life that I’ve become known for them to some extent. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I wish we had taken advantage of the amount of room I had to work with. I could have opened it up and giving the picture more field of depth. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

The message I was trying to convey was simple; Find what you like and do it. 

I’m unsure how each viewer will interact with it or how it will be interpreted. My hope is they find something positive in it.

MizzFitt

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I chose this attire and pose to represent strength in your natural beauty. Without designer clothes and societal fashion, beauty is grounded within the person. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

I chose this as my last portrait because when all is said and done, I want to be seen as a strong woman that bass in the fullness that she is. The good, bad, strengths and flaws.. I am grounded in who I am and I accept and encourage everyone to do the same. Self love is the moral of the story. 

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

No, this is a great representation of my spirituality and cultural views on life and myself as an African American woman.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I want viewers to see the pride I take in who I am and where my history begins. I want the viewers to take this as a sign to be the best them, that they can be and be proud of everything that makes them who they are today. Self love is the best love.

India Williams

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

I wanted to do styling that reflected the different cultures that make up my mixed ethnic/cultural heritage. I hoped to incorporate elements from Indian, African, Chinese, Jamaican and European culture.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

The project being my “last” portrait did greatly influence my decision making. I model regularly but rarely get to go all-out styling wise and rarely do projects that represent my background so I thought this was the perfect opportunity to take advantage of being allowed to go a little wild.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I only felt restrained in terms of the background having to be in the black box studio but I know it will help with the cohesiveness of the project as a whole. I tend to like shooting in more natural settings or in a set that adds to the story I’m trying to tell.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I hope the photo “says” that a mix of different background can blend together beautifully or at least in an interesting way. I also wanted to create an image of what I would maybe look like as a princess of the world. 

Madame Jade Payne

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

For my last portrait, I chose to embrace and embody my sexuality. Lacking the confidence to wear lingerie or any revealing clothing has been something I’ve struggled with. Being a trans woman I suffer from body dysphoria so I’d constantly compare myself to others. I learned to live up to my own standards no one else’s. I chose to wear my leather lingerie because like leather my skin has thickened over time. I chose to wear red hair demonstrate the fire that has been lit within me. I wanted the pose to look effortless while maintaining the new found confidence. 

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Yes, it most definitely factored into this Last Portrait. I typically wouldn’t wear something so provocative due to lack of self esteem. I wanted the viewer to also feel inspired to embrace their bodies and sexuality before it’s too late to do so.  

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I would have pushed myself further and done more implied nudity shots but I also wanted to be a little modest. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

I want the viewers to see the self-confidence I’ve gained. I want the viewers to feel inspired and comfortable in the skin their in as well. 

Elizabeth D.

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?

When it comes to the choice of what I wore, frankly, I came to the shoot wearing this dress because it’s something I like how I feel in, and was also expecting that Whisper would bring a different dress for me. It didn’t turn out that way, but it works in a way because it’s likely a dress I’d be caught in when the townsfolk came to raid my home and drag me off to the stake. The stake is a classic method of massacring witches, alongside with the noose  and the restraints, so I felt that paired together, it creates imagery of the people who don’t favor me trying all of these different ways of trying to get rid of me. My expression to me has anger, desparity, and betrayal, which is how I think I feel a lot of the time. Putting love and faith into people who I care for, and having them turn against me and hold me at the stake is something that has unfortunatley happened too often in my life, and this photo represents that to me. But looking up to the heavens as the flames begin to engulf me is symbolic of adversity and new hope.

Did a possible reason for this being your Last Portrait factor into your choices? If so, in what way?

Honestly, my main inspiration for doing this shoot was because – at the time – I happened to be on a “pyschedelic/stoner metal” kick, and was really feeling the energy of that genre of music in my life. What I love so much about stoner metal is the heavy influences of fantasy, witchcraft, and Magick, which are all things that have personally influenced me . I was raised by a witch in a heavily Catholic and Mormon community, and was often ostracized for my beliefs, my appearances, and overall controversial individuality. It’s never really been an issue for me, being disliked or standing out, in fact, I thrive on it because it only propells my own journey and stength, and fuels my creativity.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

The only thing I wish I had more confidence in was being nude – or at least partially nude – for this project. I find so much beauty in the human body, and I think that by being more raw, it would have furthered the impact of this piece. Especially because in witchcraft, there is such a divine energy around the female body specifically, I think that alone would have enhanced the message I was trying to get out with this concept.

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

Live your truth in the light. Don’t allow others’ negative impressions of what you’re doing, how you look, how you live, dictate your journey. You can be beaten down by harsh critics and people with less than positive intentions, but each time you pick yourself up, you will only become stronger. Be the witch who emerges from the flames with 10-times the power than before. Hell hath no fury than a woman scorned. 

Alex

Why did you make the choices you did about clothing / props / pose?  

The red headscarf cloth that was incorporated in the portrait signified my feminine ancestral connection. As someone who was born and spent my first 2 years in Kazakhstan before being adopted by an American family and relocating to Arizona, USA, I wanted my last portrait to have my ancestors present. It’s understood in many spiritual and faith communities that the cranium is the entrance into the person’s soul, which is why head coverings have been incorporated within cultural practices, and often the exposed cranium is reserved to intimate partners and family members. I chose to let my red headscarf dangle from my hands, not connected to my head, signally that I am open to the world, and hold no reservation in comparison to my ancestors. Keeping my headscarf off for the portrait was a performative intention to signal a breakage from the intergenerational trauma the women and femmes in my lineage experienced, and that my soul, my heart, by body is not constrained by my own shame and inner limitations, nor the societal norms of patriarchy, rather open and receptive to all. I chose the specific pose, arms in the air, chin extended, and eyes gently closed as it represented an expansive, outward openness to the world. The red scarf covering my body from the perspective of the camera lens represents the nebulous perception people will cast, as the world may see what it sees, yet my intention may not actually transfer to the gaze of all who witness me. 

What were you trying to say with the photo? What do you think it tells the viewer?

The overall message that I hoped to evoke was to showcase an aliveness and openness. I accept that there may be a completely different meaning that is evoked from anyone who glances at this photo without context as to what life I’ve experienced. There is an accepted grief I feel around the loss of meaning as it circulates to a wide audience. The theme of being misunderstood has been present my entire life, and I don’t expect to provide the world with a final portrait that elicits any clear significance. Fuck that.

Did you want to do something “more” with the portrait and feel restrained? Why or why not?

I really wasn’t quite sure what pose would evoke what I imagined. There were multiple poses I could have chosen from the photoshoot we did, but this chosen photo resonated most to how I wanted to be seen. I don’t think I felt constrained while getting photographed and choosing a photo.

Mike

The idea is that whenever my times comes hope that I will have mastered all of my impulses and will be remembered as a man who was in control of the “beast within” that we all have.

In the first version of this photo I wore a white priest’s frock (sans collar) to emphasize the spiritual awakening and priority. Upon reflection I felt it was a little…much and decided to play up the idea of my “white knight syndrome” and wear something a little more knight-like rather than priestly.

I carry the sword because of the knight theme, but I used the samurai sword for two reasons. One: it was the one that I had handy.
Two: for samurai, who could be thought of as knights in Japan, their sword was part of their soul. I liked the idea of a white blade being part of me, but that it was sheathed because a man should be capable of violence, but only use it if necessary to defend the weak. Since the beast is controlled the weapon is controlled.

If I were to repeat the image I’d made it less…flat. I would have liked something a bit more dynamic, but trying to piece it together while also being the subject made it logistically more difficult. I also wouldn’t have wanted to lose the composure of the “knight” me.

Another change I might make would be to make myself very old, showing that I had a long life, which God-willing I will so long as I’m having some fun and being useful. I still like the idea of it being “young” me because I’d like to think it won’t take my whole life to master the areas where the will is lacking.